It seems that the really silly stuff always happens when I have only a few minutes left on my shift. Tonight was no exception when a man came in with a prescription for his mother. The drug store across the street didn't have what he needed in stock and he wanted us to fill it. On a Friday afternoon if you don't find it at your drug store you're not going to see it until some time Monday and he was desperate to find his mom's meds. I looked on the shelf and not only did we not have what he needed, there wasn't even a place on the shelf for it. I broke the bad news to him and offered to call our store in Apollo Beach to see if they have it. While I was on hold with them he told me he'd go all the way to Brandon - which is 20 miles away - if he had to. The tech in Apollo Beach said they didn't have it but she knew they had it in the Parrish store because she sent someone there a few hours ago. I got on the horn with Parrish and sure enough, they had the drug we needed. I faxed the prescription to them and started to write down directions when the guy says to me: "My mother has new insurance but we don't have the card. Is this going to be a problem?" I told him it probably wouldn't be (even though I knew it would). We have sneaky ways of finding out what medicare part D plan people are on but I was off in 5 minutes. He told me his mother gave him a letter from Humana with her info. "Great!" I said. "This will be easy then." He handed me the letter and it was page 3 of a 3 page letter where the pertinent information I needed was on page 1. He told me his mom was in the car and she had the rest of the letter and he went out to the parking lot to get her. I continued to work while I was waiting for them to come back and all the sudden the cutest little old lady walks up to the counter. Mom was 94 years old. I got nearly all the info I needed except, of course, her ID number. Meanwhile, the son and I were talking about getting the prescription at the store in Parrish and I was telling him I faxed it there and told them he'd be by in a couple hours to get it. Mom asks, "Are we getting the medicine?" I told her no, we didn't have it and she could get in in Parrish.
"Paris? How am I going to get to Paris?"
I was really tough not to laugh but I managed. I corrected her and told her it was about 20 minutes south of us and that her son had the address of the store.
"Oh. Ok. Are you going to give me my medicine before I go there?"
"No, ma'am. They're going to give you your prescription in Parrish."
"My medicine is in Paris?"
"PARRISH" I said in that voice you use with 94 year old women who can't hear. You've heard people use that very loud, very clear voice before I'm sure. "Not Paris."
"That's right." She wandered off while I finished typing in her info. By now her son decides he just wanted to go straight there and get it as soon as he can. I called the Parrish store and told them. Mom wandered back to the counter with a box of Kleenex.
"Is my medicine ready?"
"No, ma'am, your son is going to go get it at another store."
"The one in Paris?"
(sigh)"Yes, ma'am, that one."
"Can I pay for my tissues there or should I pay for them here?"
"You should pay for them here, ma'am. The cash register is on the other side."
She paid for her tissues and off to France she went!
